“Growing up in foster care was for me, a miserable experience. Going into and living in foster care was lonely, unpredictable, and at times abusive. I learned to live with strangers, but I never escaped the sense of being an outsider, foster care was never my family; they were not even a poor substitute for being a family, they were merely strangers being paid to watch over me.

I would sometimes hide, and cry fomented by a sense of depression for my lot in life, so deep was my sense of alienation and “differentness.” I pretended that my life was all a bad dream, a painful bad dream, and I would soon wake up happily living with my mom and dad, but it was not a bad dream, it was real, and life seemed pointless. What happened to those of us in foster care, should never happen to anyone.

In the end, I survived foster care, and eventually got married, had a child and taught at a Big10 university for two decades. I am not going to be presumptuous enough to give anyone in foster care what my “secrets” to surviving foster care and becoming a successful adult, as we are all different. A lot of my success is due to luck, being in the right place at the right time so to speak. In the end, I think one thing that I might pass on is to have goals, find your purpose and believe in yourself. If you can do that you might survive and become a loving, contributing adult. Good luck.”

John R. Seita, 10/26/2021